My 3 Best Kept Travel Secrets

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December 10, 2009

Here’s the deal: Katie at Tripbase had the very clever idea to post her best 3 travel secrets, then ‘tag’ 5 others to post theirs. Jodi at LegalNomads was kind enough to tag me, so I’m gonna take my best stab at it. I’m arriving late to the party (as usual), so I suspect most of the good ones are already taken. “Pack less”, “bring more money,” and “avoid Nigerian investment opportunities” have probably been covered extensively. But fear not, I will blindly stumble forth –  forsaking fear, doubt, and common sense. As usual.

A bare-bones camping setup can really enhance your journey and take some stress off your pocketbook.

Tip #1 – Camping May Be an Option. Now, this really depends on the length of your trip and the destinations you have in mind, but a bare-bones camping setup can really enhance your journey and take some stress off your pocketbook. For my upcoming RTW trip, I’m bringing a light 1-man tent, an ultralight sleeping bag, and a slim Therm-a-Rest sleeping pad. By lurking around eBay and such, I paid a total of $350 for the setup and it all weighs less than 7 pounds. I will certainly be lugging all of this unused through many countries, but at other times I think it will come in quite handy.

During an earlier trip through Italy, I camped 1 kilometer from the heart of Sienna for $12 a night and then spent a week at the water’s edge on the coast of Sicily, drinking red wine and skinny-dipping at night while Mt. Etna glowed and rumbled in the distance. I spent 2 weeks camping 1k from Centraal Station in Amsterdam for less than the price of a hostel. All of these campsites had showers, laundry, and snack bars. On my next trip, I hope to spend a week camping on the Lido near Venice for about $15 a night and taking the vaperetto into the city in the morning. Other camping possibilities for this trip: Greece, trekking in Nepal, National Parks in any country, the Andes in South America, Central America, and the occasional “oh shit, I’m stuck in the middle of nowhere” moment.

Tip #2 – The Ultimate Travel Accessory, the Bandana. This is a simple one. Bring several of these bad boys — they can really save your butt at times. I’ve used them a coffee filter, as a doo-rag to protect my bald head from the sun (or hold in heat when it’s chilly), as a mask in dust storms, and as a tourniquet when my arm was bitten off by a shark. True story — google it (please don’t).

Run out of toilet paper? You’ll be glad you brought extras.

Tip #3 – Camels Are Evil. Ok, you weren’t expecting this one — I understand. In many parts of the world, it is considered de rigeur to go on a camel trek into the desert or pose for a photo atop one of these disgusting beasts. Do not fall for this. Camels are foul, hateful, nasty creatures. If embarking on a trek, you will sit in a ’saddle’ that is essentially a couple of 2×4’s covered with a napkin for padding. Within 30 minutes you will not be able to feel your legs. This is actually a blessing, as the crazy riding angle and the constant see-saw, back-and-forth motion will be slowly grinding away at the skin and muscle of your inner thighs. You are not going to walk right for a week.

An unhappy camel is not something to be trifled with.

When you’ve had enough of this, your guide will pull hard on the reins (attached to the camel’s nostrils) to stop your mount, thoroughly pissing him off. An unhappy camel is not something to be trifled with. We’ve all heard the stories of camels spitting – this is not exactly accurate. Like cows, camels have multiple stomachs (approximately 34 of them – I’m not exactly sure on the number) and when they spit, they basically puke the partially-digested contents of their uppermost stomachs at you. The smell is truly indescribable — imagine that you stuffed lawn clippings, goat cheese, and Satan’s spleen into a Tupperware container and stored it in the direct sun for 3 months. That would be almost as bad. A camel can ’spit’ that concoction about 50 feet in any direction with pinpoint accuracy.

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

As for who to send this to next… I really have no clue. The list of previously-contacted people is a mile long and I’ve been blogging for a couple of weeks. So let’s just say, if you’re interested in carrying the torch, send me an email or contact me on twitter.

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{ 10 comments… read them below or add one }

1 Katie, Tripbase December 10, 2009 at 12:21 pm

Super tips Johnny, thanks for sharing!

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2 Ryan February 17, 2010 at 3:01 am

LOL @ Camels are Evil. Thanks for the advice, We’re starting our RTW trip in Egypt and we’ll definitely keep your camel advice in mind! Haha.

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3 wes February 17, 2010 at 12:40 pm

Keep your eyes peeled! Have a great trip. Maybe we’ll bump into each other somewhere along the way.

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4 cody February 18, 2010 at 4:51 pm

In many parts of Scandinavia you can camp anywhere for free (of course, you won’t have such easy access to facilities):

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freedom_to_roam#In_the_Nordic_countries
(See the section about Nordic countries)

I’d say if you were gone for 2-3 months or longer on a RTW trip, free versus $15/night would be awesome :)

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5 wes February 18, 2010 at 6:08 pm

oh yeah, those kind of savings add up quickly. I spent 3 months on a motorbike in the US one summer and saved a fortune by primitive camping most nights in National Forests. Thanks for the tip!

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6 GRRRL TRAVELER February 19, 2010 at 3:09 pm

Funny Camel Tip! LOL. I agree about the camel ride- totally uncomfortable… your thighs might have been gripping but my butt was totally clenching. I would put elephant rides along in that category too. It looks so laidback & easy but its all an illusion. Sometimes, you’re only strapped in with a flimsy rope (*placebo safety)… i’ve found its another butt balancer!

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7 wes February 19, 2010 at 3:47 pm

oh no! elephants too?! Well, hopefully they don’t spit at you…

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8 Matthew March 13, 2010 at 3:26 am

A bandana for a coffee filter? That’s brilliant! With tips like that, I assure you I’ll be back to your blog!

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9 wes March 13, 2010 at 4:39 am

Heh, thanks. It works well, but it’s a one-way trip. That bandana will never look the same again ;)

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10 Capo For Guitar May 20, 2010 at 11:23 pm

I wants to include your blog to my blogroll please tell me what anchor ought to I use?

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